Lust for touch
I had dinner with a brutal dictator last night. The 10 year old son of a of a 23 year old woman.He had a fetish for a sort of crawfish or prawn. Together we kept them on the table in front of us. We put chopsticks in thier pinchers. It looked like they where trying to attack us. I think they may have felt threatened. After the laughter stopped he began to bend the seafood into awkward positions and letting them spring back to form. This ended with the systematic dissmanteling. Each leg was removed and placed in my hand. Then the still moving abdomen was tossed on the ground and stepped on. Being a boy once myself, I saw this all coming but did nothing to stop it. I didnt really care all that much. Is this the nature of things? The big ones eat the little ones? If they make us happy or make us money we give them life?
7:16 AMLast night I walked to the center of the city. My purpose was to expand on an idea. An idea of relationship and distance. Not physical but emotional. You have to love to be loved, you have to know your world to be part of it kind of thing. As I walked I was overcome by the faces passing from the darkness. I did not know them, they hardly looked different. As I passed a familiar shop I stepped inside out of mental exaustion. It was my third visit. I said hello to the woman and her daughter who have been there everytime and proceeded to avoid the rush outside. I bought four DVDs. I was charged 28 yuan. Roughly $4. The other two times I was charged 10 yuan per item. This time though the woman was on the phone and would not listen to her daughters price check. Was I being over charged the other times or was I undercharged this time? As I was leaving I was approached by two men who asked me where I was from. I told them. They asked me why I was here. I told them I was an english teacher. Then I said good-bye. All in Chinese. On the walk home the faces seemed more diverse.
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